Passion: Past the Want To

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“But if I say, “I will not mention his word or speak anymore in his name,” his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones.
I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot. “

Jeremiah 20:9 (NIV)

A compelling. That’s the best way I can think to describe passion. I believe that our gifts feed our particular passions. My husband is a naturally gifted musician. And he is passionate about playing. While I’m gifted with words, and passionate about speaking and writing. In contrast, I am not gifted athletically, so therefore I am not passionate about sports.

But here’s the funny thing about passion- sometimes you still don’t want to. Jeremiah in the Bible was a prophet who was given some less than exciting news to spread. He was instructed to prophesy about the impending doom coming to the people. And when the people did not take it well, Jeremiah wanted to stop saying it. Then in verse nine he describes the words as a fire shut in his bones. He says he couldn’t hold it in. Now that, is such a pure image of true and raw passion. Even when it hurt, even when he didn’t want to, even when it was hard, Jeremiah’s passion pushed him to deliver God’s words.

In my life, I find myself having ups and downs in the way of “want to.” Sometimes reading and studying my Bible comes so naturally that I can’t wait to sit down with my cup of coffee and dive into the Word. But other times I fight the urge to procrastinate my devotional time for another day. I used to think these “lull” times in my walk with God were a lack of passion. Like I there was something I should be doing to control my “want to.” Then one day God showed me that even on the days my “want to” was missing, I still did it anyway. Because that’s what my heart is passionate about. In fact, I would go as far as to say you can identify your passion by the things you do even when you don’t want to.

Especially in regards to your calling in your life. Passion will push you further than “want to” ever will. A true deep rooted passion for the will of God will keep you from quitting, even when quitting is what you want to do.

In Matthew 26:39, Jesus makes it clear that dying on the cross was not what He wanted to do when He says, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me…” But then Jesus makes His passion clear in the end of the verse, “Yet not as I will, but as you will.” Jesus’ passion is people. So even when the task as difficult as being crucified was brought to the table, His passion pushed Him past His comfort level…to say the very least.

Whatever it is that God has rooted passion for in your heart, don’t be discouraged by a lack of “want to.” Do it anyway. Dig deep down and utilize that passion to complete the tasks God lays out for you to do. And when you try to quit and feel the fire shut up in your bones, don’t be surprised. That’s your passion calling. Don’t grow weary by trying to hold it in. Because passion isn’t the “I want to.” Passion is the “I’m going to” even when I don’t feel like it.

Be passionate today.

Jordan Smith